Saturday, March 27, 2010

Change in Pace

I've been home with the kids long enough to write this with some confidence.

I'll freely admit that as as January drew closer and my time at work began to fade, I became more and more nervous about being at home. My patience as whole is slim to none on the best of days and I was very used to my "freedom" of working. Meaning if I had a break it was easy to go kill an hour or two chilling out at Starbucks or Chapters. I was also used to Deah running the house. I didn't always agree with how she did it, but at the end of the day if the kids were smiling, fed, watered and alive than that was all that mattered. Or so I tried to remind myself when I came home at night and it "had been a day" with Hurricane Tym tearing through the house. So the fear and apprehension of all of a sudden being Mr. Mum was beginning to sink in.

Week 1arrived and we all survived.

Week 2 arrived and we all survived.

Week 3 arrived and everyone was still alive - and smiling!

I started feeling pretty good about myself and my parenting skills. I began noticing the little things that make my kids tick. Such as Lake loves having his head scratched. And Tym can make a fort out of anything, including a hand towel! I started picking up on Lake's cues more quickly. Instead of a tired and cranky Mummy, the kids and I were laughing none stop, taking new adventures and figuring out our own way of running the house. And it feels great! I always knew I had an amazing family, but witnessing first hand day in and out the milestones of achievement is well worth the penny pinching of my not working. I will never get to see my kids like this again: The grin on Lake's face the first time he truly walked, the smirk on Tym's face when I threw a snowball at her, the ear splitting shriek of delight when Lake discovered flushing the toilet and the initial apprehension in them both at going to a new play group. I never fully realized all that I was missing until now. I'm not missing my Starbucks runs because I have Tym looking at me and saying "Mummy, you're a little cranky. Let's go make another coffee!" as she leads me to the kitchen and I hear a flush followed by a howl of laughter.

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